Sometimes I’m not sure what I’m doing or why I’m doing it.

I have a lot of projects going and it can feel overwhelming. It can seem like the solution is to dive right in and get a bunch of things done. Nothing wrong with getting things done.

But I’ve noticed that sometimes I am doing things so that I can feel good about myself, like I need to earn my place on the planet. Like, if I do enough things my existence will be justified and I can accept who I am.

It never works.

What works is cultivating self-acceptance

whether or not I eat healthful food

whether or not I go to bed at a decent hour

whether or not I write one more post

whether or not I make that phone call

When I remember that love is always an option–love for me and love for others–I settle down. I make more deliberate choices about what I do, how I do it, and why I do it. That’s when I am most effective, when I remember that I am worthwhile just sitting in a chair staring out the window. There’s nothing I need to do.

That’s when I get to decide: what do I WANT to do?

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