For parents whose kids don’t come to church


Where do other people end and you begin? I’ve been thinking lately about taking care of my own yard. When the kid I hired to mow comes over, I asked him to go ahead and mow all the way to the edge of the neighbor’s driveway in the right-of-way section near the street. I justContinue reading “Borders”


What if you just decided to trust someone? There are different kinds of trust in the world. There’s trust that things will work out in the end. There’s trust in ourselves, our capacity and kindness. And there’s trust in others. Trust in others doesn’t come from their behavior. It isn’t something they earn. It’s somethingContinue reading “Trust”

Feeling it — or not

The worst that can happen is a feeling. Emotions are just vibrations in our body. They originate in our brains when we have a thought. Regardless of how simple that sounds, we can experience some emotions as terribly unpleasant. We have four options when unpleasant emotions come up: Resist React Avoid Allow Resistance feels tight,Continue reading “Feeling it — or not”

Clean parenting

A clean house and happy kids. Every approaching birthday, Mother’s Day, and Christmas when we would ask my mom what she wanted, she would say, “A clean house and happy kids.” There were 6 of us, so those two things seemed continually mutually exclusive. We could clean the house, or we could be cheerful andContinue reading “Clean parenting”


Just like me. I’ve been thinking about what grace means for me. It’s something more than the “courteous goodwill” that comes up when I search for the definition online. It’s more like the psychological equivalent of the “simple elegance or refinement of movement” that defines physical grace. It’s a way of relating to ourselves andContinue reading “Grace”

Being a grownup

What does it meant to be in emotional adulthood? I bet everyone has said at one time or another, “She made me so mad!” or “He is frustrating me!” If you’ve been around here a while, though, you know that other people don’t control our emotions. We create our own emotions with our thoughts. AndContinue reading “Being a grownup”

I deserve this

What do you REALLY deserve? I love chocolate. There was a period of years in my marriage where I felt like I had so little enjoyment that there was no way I was going to deprive myself of the pleasure of chocolate. From time to time I would notice that I was eating more andContinue reading “I deserve this”

How to get results

It isn’t better there than here. Believing that one sentence is the secret to achieving your goals. You think you need to lose weight, find a partner, get a promotion, clean your house, and on and on. THEN you’ll feel good about yourself. THEN you’ll be worthy of love and belonging. THEN you’ll feel successful.Continue reading “How to get results”


Sometimes I’m not sure what I’m doing or why I’m doing it. I have a lot of projects going and it can feel overwhelming. It can seem like the solution is to dive right in and get a bunch of things done. Nothing wrong with getting things done. But I’ve noticed that sometimes I amContinue reading “Action!”


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